Do you feel Lonely as I am feeling?
Do you? consider me as your closest one. See How?
This article is based on a lady who is 61 and lives in IL, United States. I am writing on behalf of her as I know her very closely now. I am going to write what exactly she use to feel, which I guess 80% of the Senior Citizens feel too and have the same questions Do you feel Lonely?
So I am very sure you will get to feel the same experience and notice the same concern she had or maybe very similar. Things you need to know is how she get rid of it, what solution she got and how.
Please bear with me and read the whole article, or else save it or share it to read later.
Let see what exactly we feel (Do you feel lonely)
Seniors loneliness and Social Isolation
I feel like I got no one know who is really concerned for me, Yes no one. I am not talking about husband/wife because that is something different which we will read below.
Our kids are not really kids anymore; they have their own family and life which is more important for them. They call me some time to show little concerns maybe they feel like their duty. Sometimes they visit us and really care for us because not all of them are like this.
I am trying my best and show concerns for others but why not others do. I do babysitting for my grandkids which sometimes sound like a job to me but I still do it because I love my grandkids and I really care for my Kids. I try to be polite with everyone as others should try more as I am growing older and it is really hard to keep patience.
I feel like I am all alone, feel like I have no friends, I feel like I have no relatives, feel like I am useless, I feel like no one needs me. Yes I really feel so
Sometime people around ask me Do you feel lonely
? So mostly I say No with a fake smile on my face, I don’t know why but I do, and when I say yes that just like an answer for me nothing else.
Depression in older adults (Do you feel lonely)
I am feeling hopeless and helpless, losing interest in all those activities that I used to enjoy. I thought maybe I am growing older and feel myself under depression. This was impacting my energy, appetite, and sleep.
My relationship life
– I had a good married life till I was 51 and my interest in work, hobbies and relationship was going good. My kid used to give me much attention maybe till then we were a good couple and we used to be together all the time.
After 51 things started changing, my relationship with my husband was not as it was before maybe he was also a victim of depression in older adults. He was not having interested in sex anymore, and that broke me badly. Now its been around 10 years we had no sex and even we don’t talk to each other much.
So now I feel alone at my house, I love my grandkids so I have to visit every Monday and Friday for babysitting, even I don’t mind that doing as I love my grandkids. I really don’t mind living alone at my house without any sex as I have been managing for the last 10 years. and I don’t mind when I find my self alone but trust me I can’t do that all the time.
I do feel to have sex life, I feel like my kids should show care and concern for me, I do want people and friends attention back.
Do you feel lonely, Yes I do.
Sign and Symptoms of Depression in Elderly
- Loss of Self Worth:- Feel like I am not worthy to anyone anymore. Feel like I am a burden for everyone now, the husband has no interest in the relationship anymore, kids are busy in their own life and they consider me as a burden too. This takes me to feel like Senior’s loneliness and Social Isolation.
- Lack of Motivation and Energy:- I had no motivation and Energy in myself anymore. As there was no one to motivate me. My dream once was, you can consider as my plans for the future were to become a Social worker and help all those Seniors who feel lonely and who have symptoms of Depression in the Elderly. But today I am one of them. Do you feel lonely, Yes I do
- Sleeping Disturbance: – Changes happening in my life has ruined everything, now I have difficulty falling asleep or staying asleep. Some people like me must be having oversleeping or daytime sleepiness.
- Memory getting weak in elderly:- All humans in this entire world, please accept and always keep in your mind that everyone will grow old and your memory won’t be as sharp as now. My memory is not as it was before which sometimes make me feel stupid and make me cry.
- Increased use of alcohol or other drugs:- At this age People feel so depressed and helpless that they consider Alcohol or other drugs as their best partner which helps them to forget everything and to be in a different world. My husband does the same and I tried many times asking him do you feel lonely, in return he yell and shout on me.
- Fixation on Death:- At this age, I am surrounded by many diseases, I am overweight, have problems in breathing and have to go with knee surgery very soon. Increase of diseases at this age also destroys our life. Everybody wants to be away from us. And we have to take care of yourself. Stop thinking of Suicide or any similar things because I never thought that and trust me it’s the worst idea.
- Slowed movement and Speech:- Now because I don’t have that young memory and body anymore, so I take some time to speak and walk. Is that a crime, yes I feel so. I feel like my kids and other people hate that. Why? Everyone has to face that.
Enough about the problems, do you want to know what I did to get rid of this and how I fixed it.
Everyone please my friend I am sharing what I did and who really supported me doing this, you can find yourself depending on your mindset. My idea will definitely help you but maybe you need to add more sugar to get your sweetness. So next time our answer to Do you feel lonely?
Will be always NO and that by heart.
Idea 1:- Stop thinking you grew old and can’t do anything. This is just a myth that after a certain age older people can’t do anything. Wrong! Rubbish!
You can do everything, I am not saying this, Science says that and almost most of the people know now. You can learn new skills, new activities or fresh and new lifestyle. The truth is Human brain never stops changing, so an older you can think like young’s.
So I did it, I started learning more about Computer and Internet
as I had an interest in this. And I began with teaching Computers
to people who are of my age. In this way, I gained my confidence, money, and social Interest.
Idea 2:- Do you feel lonely, so why to be alone. Yes so why to be alone.
Engage yourself in some activities; meet people like I got a way to connect people. I Teach Computer now, which takes me 4 hours a day now and that 4 hours I am connected with people and enjoy the company.
Rest I keep myself busy on computers, you can do browsing, chat, emails social media and many more things.
Idea 3:- Follow these activities
- Take care of a Pet:- Pet gives you the best company and doesn’t let you feel alone. Take your Pet on walk though which you will spend time and also have some exercise.
- Join a club or Personal Class:- Join any Club where you meet other seniors and find them who have similar interests or problems, you will definitely enjoy that company. Get any personal class online in case you want to spend a good time at home which will give some good lessons and make you laugh as well.
- Create opportunities to laugh:- Start watching comedy shows, articles, jokes which make you laugh.
Idea 4:- Now count your remaining problems and find a way to fix it.
I found everything except physical relation. So I had two options now in front of me. Either I take divorce or be with him. I took the help of the Bible and read bible quotes about marriage problems.
:- Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding.
:-Husbands, love your wives, and do not be harsh with them.
:- Hatred stirs up strife, but love covers all offenses.
:- Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous.
:- To the rest, I say (I, not the Lord) that if any brother has a wife who is an unbeliever, and she consents to live with him, he should not divorce her. If any woman has a husband who is an unbeliever, and he consents to live with her, she should not divorce him. For the unbelieving husband is made holy because of his wife, and the unbelieving wife is made holy because of her husband. Otherwise, your children would be unclean, but as it is, they are holy. But if the unbelieving partner separates, let it be so. In such cases, the brother or sister is not enslaved. God has called you to peace. For how do you know, wife, whether you will save your husband? Or how do you know, husband, whether you will save your wife?
I don’t know what to do. Here i need your help. Please tell the author because he is the only one who supported me.
And tell me do you feel lonely
Talk to me
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